5 Parenting Skills You Need to Stop Yelling at Your Kids

90% of the parents who come to me have a problem with controlling their emotions and yelling. I often hear them say, \” I want to react calmly to my child’s misbehavior, but I can’t.”. The truth is that we want what’s best for our kids and that is why so many parents make choices that lead to frustration. Sadly, the frustration leads to the programming of the children’s brains. Yelling at your children can solve a problem at the moment but can make your child’s behavior even worse which means you have to yell more to try to correct them and the cycle continues.


I\’ve seen a lot of parents who pray for them to stop yelling but the truth is, parenting with calm is a skill and not a wish. I have once been to that point where I was wishing it\” but until I learned the skills needed to stop yelling absolutely, nothing changed. What happens is that amid the chaos, our emotional brain gets stirred up and we lose sight of our logical brain. When the brain becomes overloaded with emotions, reactivity begins which comes in the form of yelling or screaming, and none can help deal with your children. It’s our month of calm and in this post, I’m going to be sharing with you 5 skills you need to stop yelling and I added a bonus point.

  • Communication Skills: Communicating effectively doesn’t mean being calm. You can be a calm person but do not have the tools to communicate effectively. Also, being aggressive does not guarantee that your child will listen to you. There\’s a possibility that they are afraid of you. A large number of parents struggle with yelling because they have communication issues. Effective communication skills mean that your children can hear and understand you.
  • Emotional Intelligence Skills: Keeping quiet doesn’t equal managing your emotions. When people hear me talk about not yelling, one of the things that come to their mind is keeping mute when their children misbehave. When you keep quiet whenever they misbehave, instead of controlling your emotions, you\’ll erupt after some time and that can be damaging. Some skills need to be learned and emotional intelligence is one of them. You can’t manage your emotions if you are not emotionally intelligent and you\’ll continue to yell.
  • Discipline Skills: Discipline is structure. Without discipline, you can\’t effectively stop yelling, and you can\’t succeed. Structure helps your children understand discipline policies and how things should go. The schools are on holiday and many parents dread the holiday already because it is a period of yelling and screaming for them. Creating and planning for the holiday with the academy\’s Ultimate Holiday Bundle can
    be of great help instead of spending the holiday as it comes.
  • Leadership Skills: Parenting is servant leadership. It is leadership skills that let you know that you need to learn and train yourself. I shared with the parents in TIP about the servant leadership model. Every time the twins come back home from boarding school, there is a welcome settlement with posters, balloon decorations, and a sumptuous meal. It takes a lot of our time but it\’s servant leadership and by so doing, we teach our children how to become servant leaders. That is the only leadership system that works in parenting. A parent is a servant leader and that helps you recognize that there are a lot of wrong things. If you do not learn how to lead, you will struggle with yelling.
  • Learning Skills: Learning doesn’t take place in a brain that has been programmed to yelling. A good number of us were raised with yelling so our brains have been programmed as yelling machines and that’s the only way they know how to respond. While teaching the \”Understanding Your Child\’s Learning Style\” course, I taught the parents about the neuroplasticity ability of the brain where you can retrain your brain also known as reprogramming ( teaching your brain to do things differently). If you don’t reprogram your brain, no matter how much you want to change or try to be different, you will still struggle because that is how your brain has been structured. The risk is that your children\’s brains are also being programmed to yell.
  • Connection Skills: Connection simply means building a relationship with your children. Connection is fusing, being with, and talking with them. If you do not connect with your children, you won\’t stop yelling. The more you connect with your kids, the less you yell. The important question you need to ask yourself is, ” Am I willing to stop yelling?”

Parenting with calm starts with you. You need to parent with a firm, calm, and compassionate tone. It allows the child\’s brain to stay open and learn. Focus more on yourself and less on your kids. You have the most control over yourself and your response to a given situation. On this holiday, put up a structure based on activities and games that will keep you and your children occupied and at the same time entertaining. It will help you connect with them.


Anger and Yelling are the biggest frustrations of parents.

My name is Wendy Ologe, I am known as The Intentional Parent. If you know my journey, you will know that parenting with peace and calm is possible.

I was that chronic Yeller who worked so hard to achieve calmness as a parent. I didn\’t stop with myself Iโ€™ve worked with over 10,000 parents to let go of their anger and build deep, connected relationships with their children and spouses.

After authoring 10 parenting best sellers; Connect To Correct, Walking your Child Through Puberty, The Discipline That Works, Sex educate like a Pro Volume 1, Sex Educate Like a Pro Volume 2, From Yelling to Calm, Parenting Launch Plan, Resolving Sibling Rivalry, Raising Independent Thinking Child, and How To Love your child more that have sold in their tens of thousands; with over 30 parenting guides โ€ฆ. Parents have asked I put together tools and strategies that can help one move you from Yelling to Calm.

Yes, here we go ๐Ÿ’ƒ๐Ÿ’ƒIโ€™m offering you a 5-day accountability challenge, where I guide and give you strategies that will take you from yelling to Calm.

I guarantee this Challenge will change your life as a parent:
๐Ÿ“ŒIf you are a parent that struggles with anger, do you need this Challenge?

๐Ÿ“ŒIf you have been Yelling at your children and actually get tired at some point you need to join this challenge .

๐Ÿ“ŒIf you are looking for alternative ways to modify your child\’s behavior without shouting down everyone, you need this Challenge.


Join me for this challenge as I share with you how I walked through my own journey from being a yeller to a calm Parent. In this 5 days Challenge will give you a jump start on your journey to tame your temper.

In 5 days, you WILL notice a change in how often you yell at your children. You will learn how to

  • Dramatically decrease how often you lose your temper with your children.
  • Feel more confident in your ability to stay calm when things get chaotic.
  • Create a happier, more relaxed home for your entire family.
  • Ways to move from a consistent yeller to a calmer parent.
  • How to use proven strategies and tools to modify behaviors in your children without having to yell.

The first 100 participants to register will get my book 30 Days Sex Conversation Guide; a practical guide on age-appropriate Sex conversations for any age group. To register for the 5-day No Yelling Challenge:


Pay N4,999 to 0509494057, GTBank, The Intentional Parent Academy. After payment, send your full name, and proof of payment to the team: WhatsApp 0903 663 3600 or 0812 968 7040

ONLINE PAYMENT https://selar.co/Noyellingchallenge
Please Note: This first early bird registration ends on the 14th of April after that it rises to N5,999. If I can ditch yelling, you too can.
Come let\’s parent with Peace and Calm

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